WHITE WALKER ARE COOL, LOOKING LIKE ONE ISN’T
We really can’t wait for the new season of GoT. And we’re really stoked about the spin off. It’s quite interesting to know that Westeros is in our current timeline and puts the original story into perspective. For now, all we can do is wait until someone posts “Winter is Coming!” on Facebook.
Unfortunately, for us folks, winter has come. And with winter, comes flaky skin, making you look like a White Walker. Well, yeah, they are cool, but it’s not really a good idea to have skin that looks like it’s going to fall apart. So here’s a guide on how to avoid this fate. We’ve made this into Night and Morning time routines so that you know exactly what to do.
Whether you’re out and about slaying dragons, flaying traitors, or reading up on previous Maestros, your face will collect dust. You need to get that out of your skin, and the way to effectively do this is by using a face wash. Now they’ve got different sorts of washes for various types of skin, so get one that suits you.
Do you know how the Stonemen became what they are? They did not exfoliate! See, the top layer of your skin dies quickly during the winter and if you have that layer on you for long, you’ll get Greyscale. So get yourself a scrub and use it as a face wash every two days. This way you’ll get rid of the old and let the new skin come up and give you that glow.
You can basically skip this part, but hey, you’ll feel refreshed after a few dabs. Women mostly use this before applying makeup, but you can too as it removes any remaining dirt. Your face will feel like a baby’s butt after this.
People North of the Wall don’t have lotion so their skin begins to flake a lot. That’s how they actually turn into Walkers. Seriously though, we’ve seen countless of men who have a white layer of skin originating from disgustingly grey elbows. That’s stomach turning dry skin for your information. The way to ward it off is to use lotion. Get something with cucumber in it because it’s a great hydrating ingredient and apply it all over your body.
This is your Dragon Glass. We can’t imagine how sexy time is for the partners of men who have really dry skin. It must be like putting yourself though a cheese grater. If you are one of these guilty men, you have the options to be beheaded, sent to the Wall, or to adopt a bottle of glycerine. It’s cheap and effective. Use it on your lips, elbows, hands, knees, shins, and feet. Just don’t lick it off, that’d be counterproductive!
Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man’s skin looking great like… fries? You get what I’m saying
After you get up and crackle you spine, hand, ankles and foot wrists, put on your leg shirt and upper pants, get into the bathroom and wash your face. Now, contrary to popular belief, don’t use your face wash during this time. Along with dirt, it pulls away oils too. Oils moisturize the skin, and during the winter time, or any other time for that matter, it’d be a bad idea. Besides, what have you even done during the night time to collect dirt? Slayed a king?! Ffttt… you wish. Your skin is already clean from the night before.
Night section > Lotion > Copy > Paste > You already know why.
“Sun block?! That’s for summer, you idiot!”
It’s called sun block because it blocks the sun. Has the sun gone away? You feel dumb now, don’t you? But don’t worry, you’re not alone, many leave this part out. You still need to protect yourself from the harmful UV rays that’s ever radiating from that fire ball in the sky. Especially when you consider the amount of time we spend in its comforting warmth to survive the cold, we really do need this. Don’t you ever skip out on this.
Another lady-stuff! Let’s just skip to the “why” part. Eye creams are great for reducing puffiness of the eyes, and virtually everyone wakes up with puffy eyes. This will not only reduce that, but will give you an instant wake-up-punch as well. Also, it’s great for kicking wrinkles’ and laugh lines’ ass.