Any healthy relationship has its share of arguments and it is a good thing, it helps dissipate negativity and nudges the relationship forward. However, some arguments can’t be talked out or settled with the help of flowers and chocolates. What might help is some hairpulling, butt spanking, even choking… sex. Angry, nasty, I’m taking about what-I-want-andto-hell-with-who-I’m-taking-it-from type of sex is exactly what was missing from your sex life.
When you partake in sexual intercourse you do your best to please your partner; at least that is what you should be doing. But with angry sex you don’t have to think, all you have to do is want and act on it. Anger, one of the most primal of emotions, is what instigates this sort of behavior. It’s not about expressing your love for your lover, it’s about going at it until she’s unsure she’ll be able to walk or stand properly the next day.
One thing to keep in mind is the type of relationship you’re in. What is the level of trust and understanding that you have between each other? There are chances that things can take a wrong turn quickly and what was supposed to be a hot romp may turn into sex without consent. So it’s not the best way to solve an argument over where you guys want to go eat on your third date.
Having cleared that up, let’s get to how some good nookie can wipe those frowns right away from your faces.
If it’s not in your nature to be aggressive, then this can be a little difficult. It is a good idea to set up ground rules, what’s OK, what’s too much.Things like pulling hair (large amounts near the base, otherwise it’s just painful), or smacking her ass tend to be considered “angry sex”. Switching positions without asking, tossing her around and positioning her quickly without telling her what is coming next.
BE AROUSED BY YOUR ANGER.
The adrenaline rush you get from arguing with your partner can be turned into something more carnal. In fact, this adrenaline rush from fighting is similar to the adrenaline rush you get when you are aroused. So why not turn the fight into something you will both physically enjoy even when you’re at odds with each other?
To do this, avoid uttering harsh words that will further draw your partner away. Instead, find the erotic possibilities of this energy. Let that sexual energy take the lead and let yourself be turned on by your partner’s pouty lips and flushed skin.
ANGER, ONE OF THE MOST PRIMAL OF EMOTIONS, IS WHAT INSTIGATES THIS SORT OF BEHAVIOR.
START SURE BUT SLOW.
Just because you’re angry and your emotions are high doesn’t mean you should jump the gun and have sex with your partner even if he or she doesn’t want to. That can actually lead you to more trouble. Instead, go slow and look for signs that your partner will be receptive to your sexual advances even in the heat of the moment.
Touch the hand, stroke the arms, or draw your lips closer to test the waters while you diffuse the situation just enough for you to make your move. If your partner kisses you back, even if angrily, well, it’s on for angry sex.
Once you get started and all that angry energy is being transformed into sexual energy and arousal, this is the time when you should make your move. Your partner may be confused by the sudden change in the atmosphere so it’s all up to you.
Take your partner right there and then, or strip each other as you nudge your partner towards the bedroom. Whatever it is, be quick and assertive enough so your partner will not have second thoughts about the deed you are going to do.
DON’T OVERDO IT.
Angry make up sex can give you an opportunity to finally re-enact that Mr. and Mrs. Smith moment you’ve always wanted to try. However, those moves are meant for the movies and everything in real life must be done and enjoyed in moderation. Be careful not to let your anger take the lead or else you may end up hurting each other and the sex won’t be as pleasurable, in fact, it can lead to disaster.
RECONNECT, NOT REPRESS.
Don’t use angry sex to put your issues aside. It might just be a break, but you know you have to face the music afterwards. And if you repress the issue just so you can have a great lay, the problem is still out there and may turn up again later on, with greater intensity.
Still, make the most of your intimate moments even with angry sex. You can use this constructively to not only let out those pent-up frustrations but to even reassert your feelings and stance in the relationship.
DON’T BRING UP THE FIGHT MID-HUMP.
Don’t ever EVER bring up anything related to your fight in the middle of your romp. You don’t want to turn off your partner, and bringing up the topic of the fight might do just that.
Done right, angry sex can further reignite your profound love for each other, especially if both of you talk about your problems after sex. But done wrong, it can tear your relationship apart with unfinished conflicts and horny excuses to avoid an argument.