We Nepalese men are not exactly known for our silver tongue with the ladies. Chances are that talking to women may not be the biggest gun in your arsenal. Our upbringing may be to blame here as most of us men are never actually taught how to tactfully talk to women. No doubt, some of us go through life without being able to attract as many women as we’d like. But of course, this doesn’t necessarily mean that things can’t change. Talking to a woman doesn’t have to be difficult. You just need to be aware of what they are turned on by and what turns them off. So here are 13 quick tips that should guide you in wooing that beautiful dame you’ve been eyeing for the past few weeks or even years. Follow this list below and you should do just fine.

1. Tread on topics that give you a chance to showcase your emotional side. The safest bet to start up a conversation is to ask about her childhood memories, ambitions and passions. These topics will open up her emotional floodgates, so hold on tight. But watch your step as you do not want to be sucked into the forsaken friendship zone. Avoid being too personal or intrusive.

2. Women want a guy who is not afraid to take the lead. While talking to a woman take the lead on setting the topic or tone of conversation. Don’t wait for her to dictate what you’ll be talking about and she will appreciate the confidence. But talk about something she can relate to and will enjoy listening to, rather than blabbering about last night’s game.

3. Her actions speak as loudly as her words. Pay attention to the non verbal cues a woman is giving you. Well, if you’re standing too close to her and accidentally spitting when you talk, her non verbal cues may not be too difficult to decipher. But whatever the case is, she will send you the hints. Pay attention to them.

4. Remember this motto, ‘Fun not Funny’. Women are attracted to men who make their time together enjoyable and fun. Don’t concentrate on having only the funniest jokes. Concentrate on showing them a good time. Studies have shown that during an initial contact, it’s psychologically impossible to dislike someone who has made you laugh genuinely for 5 times or more.

5. Tease women. One of the easiest ways to take a conversation to a fun and flirty level is to tease your female compatriot. Don’t offend her though. Think back to your time on the playground. Don’t end up pulling her pigtails or scribbling on her face, but tease her in a way which has her blushing and giddy with laughter. Avoid ending up with a slap across your face.

6. Get intimate with her. Hold on, we didn’t mean that. Pull your pants back up! By getting intimate, we suggest that you delve into more personal things. Women are turned on by men who are not afraid to take a conversation to a personal, intimate level. Now, wipe that drool off your face.

7. Women love to hear opinions about themselves. Tell her what you observe about her. Admire her, charm her. But avoid complimenting a woman too much. If you are complimenting a woman too much, she will think you’re trying to impress her. Well, you are trying to impress her but it is best that you not make it too damn obvious. And don’t end up criticizing her too soon, especially about her looks.

8. Remember, ‘Statements over Questions’. Instead of asking, “Where did you grow up?” say, “You don’t look like you grew up around here!” This allows you to make observations about her and express your personality.

9. Do not compliment her on her eyes, looks or body too soon in the conversation. When complimenting her, flattering the girl on her bodily aspects too soon may make you seem vague and materialistic. You don’t want to be taken for that just another guy trying to get into her pants. Just compliment her on something you genuinely find attractive, and mean them. Admiring her uni-brow is not the best of ideas.

10. Avoid the Friendship Zone. Don’t blurt out that you want to get her in bed, but make it clear that you want to be more than friends. If you don’t, you run the risk of winding up in the ‘Friendship Zone’.

11. Use conversation games to keep the mood fun and flirtatious. Games can be anything extreme like “truth or dare” or to the less extreme games like the “5 questions game”. Interesting games like these will keep a conversation going if you hit a dead end.

12. Don’t give away your hand so fast. Women like men who are a challenge. If you want to keep a woman’s interest, she has to feel like she is slowly winning you over. If she thinks you’re too easy, she’ll lose interest soon.

13. Listen. Listen, Goddamit! Your heroic adventure stories can wait. It is much safer than talking too much and rather making yourself look like a fool.

Words: Aditya Malla